Medic

As a medic in the military, I found that medical personnel have a macabre sense of humor. I know it is a coping mechanism, but it took a while to get used to it. ON the first day in the Emergency Room, one medic was urged to give a patient on a gurney CPR. The poor medic kept at it for nearly 30 minutes before exhaustion started to set in and a kindly nurse finally let him know that it was okay to stop because the patient had been declared dead an hour ago.

Practice makes perfect I guess. I am glad it wasn't me though.

One day I was instructed to give a heart patient a bedbath. I have performed many of these and I had come to be fairly expert at that time. This was my first day on the cardiac ward as loaner. Before that I have worked in Pediatrics and later the unspecified ward where we get a lot of old people with congestive heart failure.

I grabbed my supplies and headed to the room for the bedbath. When I walked in the door, there was a 28 year old, fully awake MAN. I had never given a bedbath to anyone over 10 or under 70. I stopped dead in my tracks, blushed furiously, set the soapy water and sponge in front of the startled patient and RAN FOR THE HILLS.

...it turns out all the nurses were waiting right outside the room and had a gleeful chuckle due to my obviously embarrassed state.

I have noticed that far from being the "weaker" sex, women seem to deal with blood a whole lot better than men do. Far more men seem to pass out from shots, blood taking, and general goriness.

Which leads me to the question, why is a spineless guy called a "pussy"? I mean, geez, females tend to deal with the whole puking, bleeding, incontinence and other bodily fluids thing a whole lot better.